Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Top 10 Reasons Spurrier Called Two Timeouts against Tennessee

Late in South Carolina's game against Tennessee, Spurrier inexplicably called two timeouts on 4th down before finally deciding to punt. A few minutes later, those two timeouts would come back to haunt South Carolina as Tennessee kicked a game winning field as time expired.

After the game, all anyone wanted to know was what was Spurrier thinking. No one knows, even Spurrier.

But we think we've stumbled upon the Top 10 things running through Spurrier's mind when he called those two timeouts:

  1. He heard the beginning of Todd Ellis’ sales pitch on Burnlounge. He was intrigued and wanted to hear more.
  1. He was on hold with Ellis Johnson to offer Ellis his old job back, and felt like a second timeout would be enough time for Ellis to take his call. He was wrong. On both accounts…
  1. He received a text from Stephen Garcia saying he was running a few minutes late to their postgame rendezvous. Spurrier didn’t want Garcia to feel awkward while waiting.
  1. He has a fondness for Rocky Top and wanted to see how long the Tennessee band could play it uninterrupted.
  1. He wanted to catch the end of the Jadeveon Clowney/Ricardo Hurley hangman game. He needed both timeouts to finish it.
  1. Jesse Palmer was just coming on the ABC broadcast and Spurrier wanted to be there for his favorite former quarterback.
  1. Spurrier heard a rumor about two coaches possibly getting into an argument. After missing the first coach on coach crime, Spurrier wanted to make sure he was available for round 2.
  1. A few of the defensive players were suspended for 10 minutes of real time and Spurrier wanted to teach them a lesson by making them not miss any playing time.
  1. He was only one timeout behind "You can't spell timeout without UT" Phillip Fulmer for most wasted timeouts and felt like there was no greater place to own the record than on Phillip’s old turf.
  1. The coeds from Tennessee’s “Orange Pride” hostess program were spotted on the sidelines. By the time Spurrier realized what was going on, he had already burned two timeouts.

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